The NICU is hard. We're here to help.

writing this 11 days postpartum — to give you context. My son is in the nicu because he was born at 31 weeks and 6 days which is preterm. I’ve been really missing my baby around the clock. ⏰ I hardly sleep even if he isn’t here and I don’t have to watch him at home I still don’t “deeply sleep” even if I do I even dream of my son. So I’m constantly thinking about him when he’s apart from me. I’ve been a little shitshow. ☝️ though he’s doing great, apparently he’s an overachiever. 💙 I’m keeping hope alive to bring him home as soon as possible. I can’t be apart any longer! 💙 it’s killing me. It’s looking like mid January-maybe first week of February it all just depends. I wanted to write my experience a bit with nicu life/premie life it’s a different kind of grief and whirlwind of emotions when you have to overcome guilt a bit for leaving your baby in a hospital/incubator. You wish you can trade places and give you more strength. I hold my breath every time the doctors talk to me worried they might say your health is declining. It’s hard not to freak out right away. I think that’s just the worried mommy in me. I’m really going to protect him in the fiercest way possible. I made him, struggled my entire pregnancy with him, nearl died in recovery from birthing him due to a hemorrhaging issue, had so much stress on my heart from that, and only to get discharged without my son in the car seat, or his crib. So naturally I will be protective of this tiny precious little thing I made & miss dearly right now. So postpartum has been weird for me. I’m not able to tend to my child as much. He’s also a far commute to the hospital he was born at. So it’s a long drive to be able to hold my baby. Which I don’t mind I’ll do anything to see him. but would love if he was just at home. 🏠 💙🧑‍🧑‍🧒 🐱 can’t wait to have him home boy I’m counting down the days. Can’t wait to see everything he’s going to be. 💙 but man I’m gonna be honest I’m okay— I’m going to be okay, just surviving right now and that’s okay too. Currently fundraising for coverage of travel expenses to see our son, food, due to having unpaid maternity leave while child in the nicu.