imUnsure

As an East Asian woman in experimental performance, I confront the contradiction that access to resources doesn’t equate to creative freedom. Unconscious biases shape how my work is received, and questions like, “Why can’t you do better when you have all the opportunities now?” overlook the cultural expectations that constrain artistic expression. The paradox of being hypervisible as a diversity statistic but muted as a creative voice lies at the heart of this work. “imUnsure” is a reclamation of space for those of us who have been silenced by institutional gaslighting, confronting tensions such as: “If I am the only East Asian woman in the room and voice dissent, must I scream to be heard? Am I not allowed to talk about “struggles”? Who decides what ‘freedom’ looks like? Why are certain expressions deemed ‘too political’ only when they come from certain bodies?”

East Asian women in America have long been confined to stereotypes of domesticity or hypersexualization. Despite increased visibility, patriarchal values continue to hinder integration. Younger generations often employ cautious adaptation strategies, but these nuanced negotiations are misread as passive compliance, reinforcing these historical stereotypes. Caught between patriarchal expectations and Western misconceptions, East Asian women face systemic pressures in their pursuit of belonging.

“imUnsure” illuminates the hybrid cultural identities of East Asian female immigrants as they reconcile inherited values with the realities of American society. While existing Asian American initiatives primarily focus on U.S.-raised generations, the struggles of recent immigrants and their innovative bridge-building strategies remain understudied. This project co-creates narrative platforms with these women, fostering cross-cultural understanding and inclusive community practices.

The work unfolds through two intertwined narratives:
Sonic Revolt – Acoustic and pre-recorded sounds manifest the dissonance between external expectations(U) and internal reality(i). Distorted vocal recordings reveal how marginalized voices are filtered through dominant cultural frameworks. Rigid musical structures fracture under the weight of admonishments from female relatives, exposing the persistence of patriarchal norms that unconsciously persist across generations. Repetitive, mechanical gestures mirror our polite inquiries—until our voices are exhausted, drowned in relentless chaos. Fragmented phrases and chanting create a soundscape that invites introspection, while extended techniques and virtuosic cadenzas embody the painstaking language acquired to communicate, only to collapse under imposed limitations. Chanting threads through the work, weaving a meditative soundscape that builds a “safety net,” inviting introspection and reconciliation.

Spatial Subversion – The piano becomes a site of rebellion as I move from playing a detuned MIDI controller to the piano itself. Interactive visuals, responsive to pitch bends, map cultural memory onto spatial sound design. A suspended hanji (Korean traditional paper) screen materializes the invisible barriers within supposedly “free” artistic spaces—where my actions remain unseen behind the screen while my amplified performance is heard, my true self only revealed when a composer steps forward to tear the paper away. Body percussion scrutinizes the resonance of the fat beneath my skin, challenging the beauty standards imposed on East Asian women—by themselves, their diaspora, and outsiders—to teach self-love.

“imUnsure” rejects performative inclusivity. Through deliberate sonic imperfections and physical interventions, the work illustrates that true artistic freedom requires institutional willingness to embrace expressions that defy predefined frameworks.