May It All Be For Beauty 💚

With the first thought I had about doing a fundraiser, my throat fell into my stomach. In exploring the intense vulnerability one is faced with when asking for anything, (let alone something that represents a deep need), I realized that the idea of asking for help wasn’t scary because I was afraid I might not get it, it was scary because I was afraid of losing connection.

And then I realized that when I don’t ask the people in my life to participate in my story...I am also losing connection. Because there is nothing more powerful to bind us together as humans than the shared meeting of our mutual needs. We cook for one another because we need food to survive. We hug one another because we need touch to belong. The deeper the needs we meet, the more intimate the relationship.

But often- even if it is unconscious- it is far easier for us to be strategic in how we get those needs met than it is to be vulnerable. To simply tell the heart-swallowing truth of our experience, then surrender to the uncertainty that comes with any question we ask that is really listening for the answer. But this is where real human connection happens. When we can trust each other enough to ask, and respect each other enough to listen. It is my clear intention to make this ask not only respectful, but beautiful. To share with you the truth of my need, and love you whatever the answer.

This animated short brings to life a very special poem of mine, I think you'll enjoy it. :)

Reverse Crowd-Funding

In a funny way, I’m sort of here asking for forgiveness rather than permission. In that sense, this is a bit a reverse Kickstarter. Most people start a crowd-funding campaign because they want the resources to complete a project…they want some runway to get their vision off the ground. What I need right now is less of a runway and more of a landing strip. That is to say that rather than asking for the support to do what I wanted to do, I already did it. I spent the last year creating space in my life with priority for finishing and launching my first book! I did so in a way that was somewhat naively trusting if I just stayed true to the art it would somehow magically all work out, (some valuable lessons learned rest assured), and as a result I fell into debt. I’m only now realizing there’s one important detail of that equation I forgot to factor in…which is that trusting my art will be supported only works if other people know it exists…and that support is needed. So I'm trying to remedy both of those problems here. ☺️

A Vote For Art

This campaign is, essentially, an opportunity to vote for art. An opportunity to vote for heart and those vital offerings that express a deep, even at times wounding, engagement with life. It is my devotion to this transcendent task that has landed me- despite my best efforts otherwise- in the cliche of a starving artist. What I am striving for is the freedom to live an exquisite life, a life of presence, the life of the artist…of the shaman. To be a bridger of worlds, of the numinous and the tangible. But to do that in a sustainable way requires finding those people in the world who are inspired enough by my art to want to participate in it! Those who want to vote for living on a planet where the level of space and stillness required for the artist to dance inspiration into the world is honored by the laws of commerce rather than suffocated by them.

Campaign Summary

🥒 THE PICKLE
I borrowed money from a friend to buy a van I could build out and live in. It was our agreement that after a year if I had not paid the van off I would get a loan from the bank and return to my friend the remaining balance. After paying $10k of it off, $23,500 is now the amount coming due for me to honor this agreement with my generous friend, but I’ve run into unexpected difficulty getting the bank to lend.

👏 THE ASK
It is through the freedom afforded to me by living in a van that I am able to live a lifestyle conducive to making my art, and to sharing it with the world. My heartfelt invitation is for you to review the gift exchange tiers listed below and- if you feel so moved- to select the gift amount (or write in an amount) that feels best in your body. In so doing you will become forever a part of my story and my art. :)

SOME ENCOURAGING MATH: Strength in numbers!

If 125 people gift exchange $200…I own my home!
If 250 people gift exchange $100…I own my home!
If 500 people gift exchange $50…I own my home!
If 1000 people gift exchange $25…I own my home!

Gift Exchange

The gifting tiers are structure incrementally with the option to write in any amount (more or less than the pre-defined amounts). A PDF version of my book is available freely below. For a gift of any amount (even a single dollar) I will send a download link to my audiobook. Please note that two of the books listed below are pre-purchases, I expect to be sending them out in Fall or Winter (depending on which book) of this year. These books come from the deep well of my heart, my wrestling with life and love (and whatever God is) and living to tell the tale.

To experience more of my work, click HERE or on the images below and checkout previews of each book!

📕 PDF Download

If you’re unsure about the value of my work in your life, feel free to check out the eBook and decide if you’re inspired to participate in my story! You can download a free PDF of the book HERE.

Tier 1: ANY AMOUNT Audio Book Download

Audio Book Download: When The Gods Were Half Human

🔊 AUDIO BOOK PREVIEW

Tier 2: $50 Paperback + Audio Book

Signed Paperback: When The Gods Were Half Human
Audio Book Download: When The Gods Were Half Human

Tier 3: $75 Early Release eBook + Hardcover + Audio Book

Early Release eBook (PDF/EPUB) [Fall]: Beautiful Cloud Faraway Sky
Signed Hard Cover: When The Gods Were Half Human
Audio Book Download: When The Gods Were Half Human

Tier 4: $100 2 Audio Books + eBook + Hardcover

Early Release Audio Book [Fall]: Beautiful Cloud Faraway Sky
Audio Book Download: When The Gods Were Half Human
Early Release eBook (PDF/EPUB) [Winter]: Earth & Sky
Signed Hard Cover: When The Gods Were Half Human

Tier 5: $200 Personalized Poem + 2 Audio Books + 2 Hardcover Books

A Personalized Poem: Written by me for/about special people or events/experiences in your life!
(Early Release) Audio Book [Fall]: Beautiful Cloud Faraway Sky
Audio Book Download: When The Gods Were Half Human
(Early Release) Signed Hard Cover [Winter]: Earth & Sky
Signed Hard Cover: When The Gods Were Half Human

Top Tier: $200+ (write in amount)

Preserve A Poet's Natural Habitat.

By Kaelum Gaynes

Preserve A Poet's Natural Habitat.

A vote for art...help me stay in my camper van!

Team Members